SiZe QueeNS

No matter who tells you otherwise, men are just as much size queens as women are. The worst part is for some reason, probably because of where I work, people seem to like to tell me about people they knows dick size. I fuckin hate it, I was just having a serious conversation with someone and they told me that about someone I knows dick size. Right in the middle of talking about something serious they slip that in. I flipped asking what the fuck that had to do with what I was talking about and even if it did I don’t fucking care, I’m straight, I’m not going to fuck him so why the fuck should I care.
I have cracked the shits a few times with my female friends when they start letting the too much information stuff slip out. I once had a screaming argument with a friend after I told her she could sleep on the couch after going on and on and on, even after I told her to shut the fuck up or she can get sleep on the couch. We weren’t even yelling about what she said, she cracked it and insisted driving home while still a bit drunk. I wasn’t gunna let her out of the house. Id rather she sleep in my bed with me on the couch than her losing her license or crashing. Eventually she left angry and drove home. We made up eventually. One argument isn’t gunna fuck up a long friendship, just scare it into reality.
I’m surrounded at work by enormous cocks, juicy pussies and gaping arseholes. I like to laugh at dick stuff probably more than most because of my stunted sense of humor but I really don’t need to know any info about people I've met or knows dicks.


aNGRY NiCe GuY - rant 1
I was reading a cool little comic called Hopeless Savages - Ground Zero, by Van Meter, O’malley, Clugston-Mayer, Norrie & Watson. I liked it a lot but one bit I really liked which was said by a nerdy guy character called Ginger and here it is :
“I don’t want to be the nice guy you hang out with while you repair the damage done to your self image by egotistical thugs who wildly underestimate your worth.
I don’t want your head on my shoulder while you tell me what a great friend I am, so sensitive, just like a brother.
I don’t want to act happy for you when you go off with some charismatic idiot who – at best – thinks you are an ordinary girl… and not the treasure I know you to be.”
These are the words that go through my head again and again, I have the curse of the nice guy, the guy you don’t fuck but always seems to be there for you when you fall. It sucks. Sometimes I want to scream.
“I’m not a nice guy, the shit that swirls round in my head would scare you.
I’m not a nice guy, I’m a fuckin pervert who want to pick you up at a club and fuck you hard against a brick wall in an alley nearby because I cant wait to get you home.
I’m not a nice guy, I’m a guy who wants to tie you up and spend hours on your naked body using whatever implements I have and what I can improvise.
I’m not a nice guy, I want you to force me to be your fuck slave, force feeding me viagra if you have to.
I’m not a nice guy, I want to hold you face down, lube you up and fuck your arse until you cum hard, as you never could with your pussy.
I’m not a nice guy, I want you to strap it on and fuck me hard for being a whiney bitch, yet again.
I’m not a nice guy, I want to tie you to a tree blindfolded with you pants around your ankles, then play with your exposed body without making a sound.
I’m not a nice guy, I want to take you to a bondage club, tie you up naked and let everyone watch me take you beyond what you thought you could take.
I’m not a nice guy, I’m just as perverted, maybe more as the next guy, but because I’m “like big teddy bear” you will never see the inner animal. You may see glimpses, but it scares you, you cant take it, you explain it away with excuses of drunkenness or weird moods. Its not weird to me, I’m just horny, I’m always horny. I have had years of practice, I know how to hide it. Do you have any idea how many scenarios are played out, how many fantasies are created in my mind a day. Why the fuck do you think I write this blog, do my zine and read my books on sexual stuff. It keeps me sane, unfortunately at the same time it feeds the beast. It’s a vicious circle. I cant get out of it, and wont even if I could because I like it, it keeps me sane. So fuck you and your Nice Guy shit, go fuck yourself, cos I sure as hell wont fuck you.