Babies
my friend has had the baby
I am so thrilled and so want to see the little guy and say hello, but ill have to wait til the new family gets settled back at home. his dad sounds over the moon and a little delirious from weird sleep times and excitement, he was already such a hyper happy guy its funny to see it go into overdrive.
Monday, September 28
Monday, September 7
Births & Deaths & Other Stuff
Birth
In a couple of weeks my best friend is having a baby.
For the many years we have known each other we both agreed that we didn't want kids, she was the sort of person who freaked out when handed a kid/baby to hold, im the opposite, i love that sort of stuff. I've got 14 nephews and nieces (catholic family). I love acting like an idiot with the little ones, making stupid faces, playing kids games and I have the fortunate ability to be able to calm down most babies enough to fall asleep in my arms (most of the time).
Ive learnt more about pregnancy from her than with my many relatives. I even saw it move, which was possibly the weirdest thing ive ever seen in my life.
Its strange, I have lost a fellow non-breeder, but Im also thrilled shes having a baby.
Death
A few month ago my older brother died, it was sudden and unexpected. He died of a heart attack at 49. In a family of 9 kids he was number 3, so i cant imagine the paranoia of the 2 older than him. Any chest pain I get automatically sets me off into heart attack paranoia. He was with the CFA, so he had a guard of honour as the hearse left the church and when it arrived at the cemetary, which was cool. i was a pallbearer, I cried lots. I cried more than when my parents died, I even did the collapse in the shower sobbing thing. It was all very fucked and strange.
A day after the funeral I had the flu, probably caught it at the funeral. I ended up taking a week off work. I couldnt eat more than a mouthful or 2 of food every couple of hours. I wasnt fully okay for around 3 weeks. I call it the month of hell.
Other Stuff
I had another MRI a few months ago, getting the results next week. Itll probably be the same old shit, "we dont know what it is, try this medication" and the medication will fuck me up somehow and ill stop taking it after a couple of weeks, and then 6 months later another MRI and the cycle repeats.....
In a couple of weeks my best friend is having a baby.
For the many years we have known each other we both agreed that we didn't want kids, she was the sort of person who freaked out when handed a kid/baby to hold, im the opposite, i love that sort of stuff. I've got 14 nephews and nieces (catholic family). I love acting like an idiot with the little ones, making stupid faces, playing kids games and I have the fortunate ability to be able to calm down most babies enough to fall asleep in my arms (most of the time).
Ive learnt more about pregnancy from her than with my many relatives. I even saw it move, which was possibly the weirdest thing ive ever seen in my life.
Its strange, I have lost a fellow non-breeder, but Im also thrilled shes having a baby.
Death
A few month ago my older brother died, it was sudden and unexpected. He died of a heart attack at 49. In a family of 9 kids he was number 3, so i cant imagine the paranoia of the 2 older than him. Any chest pain I get automatically sets me off into heart attack paranoia. He was with the CFA, so he had a guard of honour as the hearse left the church and when it arrived at the cemetary, which was cool. i was a pallbearer, I cried lots. I cried more than when my parents died, I even did the collapse in the shower sobbing thing. It was all very fucked and strange.
A day after the funeral I had the flu, probably caught it at the funeral. I ended up taking a week off work. I couldnt eat more than a mouthful or 2 of food every couple of hours. I wasnt fully okay for around 3 weeks. I call it the month of hell.
Other Stuff
I had another MRI a few months ago, getting the results next week. Itll probably be the same old shit, "we dont know what it is, try this medication" and the medication will fuck me up somehow and ill stop taking it after a couple of weeks, and then 6 months later another MRI and the cycle repeats.....
Wednesday, August 19
Wednesday, August 12
Sunday, April 19
BaCK To BLoGGiNG
heres whats been happening
i had laryngitus and it made my hangover headaches into punch in the head every time i coughed
it sucked
i had laryngitus and it made my hangover headaches into punch in the head every time i coughed
it sucked
Wednesday, February 4
HaVeNT BeeN BLoGGiN' FoR WHiLe
whats been happening?
my health sucks, my brain sucks like a black hole
i recently went back to the hospital for yet another MRI, i got results months later, it turns out i have 2 new patches of white matter density changes.
my headaches had been getting worse, and now they (finally) think the brain problems are the reason for the headaches.
i recently had a lumbar puncture (spinal tap), the 1st attempt they fucked it up and hit a nerve a coupla times, that wasnt fun, so i had to come back the next day and get it done with the help of an xray, that was easy
i also got to see a small vial of my spinal fluid, its clear like water
the next 4 hours of laying on my back to prevent post puncture migraines sucked. i had a book and a magazine and still got bored, i counted the squares on the light above me, there was 666, it was satans light.
there was a guy in the oppsite bed who had prostate problems, pissing every 20 minutes for 3 hours, then he had a catheter, wasnt a nice thing to hear, especially when you need to piss
i had to give another few vials of blood a week or 2 later
now i gotta go back and get a spinal MRI (next week) and finally a week after that i get the results.
as usual itll probably be "we dont know"
more updates soon
G
my health sucks, my brain sucks like a black hole
i recently went back to the hospital for yet another MRI, i got results months later, it turns out i have 2 new patches of white matter density changes.
my headaches had been getting worse, and now they (finally) think the brain problems are the reason for the headaches.
i recently had a lumbar puncture (spinal tap), the 1st attempt they fucked it up and hit a nerve a coupla times, that wasnt fun, so i had to come back the next day and get it done with the help of an xray, that was easy
i also got to see a small vial of my spinal fluid, its clear like water
the next 4 hours of laying on my back to prevent post puncture migraines sucked. i had a book and a magazine and still got bored, i counted the squares on the light above me, there was 666, it was satans light.
there was a guy in the oppsite bed who had prostate problems, pissing every 20 minutes for 3 hours, then he had a catheter, wasnt a nice thing to hear, especially when you need to piss
i had to give another few vials of blood a week or 2 later
now i gotta go back and get a spinal MRI (next week) and finally a week after that i get the results.
as usual itll probably be "we dont know"
more updates soon
G
Friday, October 10
MY aNNoYiNG BRaiN
Recently i was diagnosed with a mental illness, its not something as hardcore as bi-polar/schizophrenia so I don't have to take medication (thank fuck), but it's frustrating and annoying. I'm getting treatment and its under control.
My emotions seem to be out of whack. The thing that kicked it off was I was watching a funny film and I felt like crying, it was weird enough that I decided to go to the doctor. I've had emotional freak outs before, but I can usually pin point what caused it, this time nothing obvious set it off. I'm seeing a psychologist, and also meditating when I get a chance, cos it helps me calm down. The doc suggested medication but I wanna avoid that stuff. My emotions feel a bit raw and sensitive, everything seems to set me off.
When I describe it to female friends they say it sounds like PMS, that made me laugh.
I used to get frustrated with people with mental illness, I didn't understand it, I learnt some stuff from my flatmate who works with intellectual disabled people which helped. Now im one of them.
It can happen to anyone, it can happen without warning and it can happen to someone you know
My emotions seem to be out of whack. The thing that kicked it off was I was watching a funny film and I felt like crying, it was weird enough that I decided to go to the doctor. I've had emotional freak outs before, but I can usually pin point what caused it, this time nothing obvious set it off. I'm seeing a psychologist, and also meditating when I get a chance, cos it helps me calm down. The doc suggested medication but I wanna avoid that stuff. My emotions feel a bit raw and sensitive, everything seems to set me off.
When I describe it to female friends they say it sounds like PMS, that made me laugh.
I used to get frustrated with people with mental illness, I didn't understand it, I learnt some stuff from my flatmate who works with intellectual disabled people which helped. Now im one of them.
It can happen to anyone, it can happen without warning and it can happen to someone you know
Thursday, August 21
iM MoRe.....
one thing i hate about hanging out with anarchists is the occasional "im more working class than you" conversation. usually contains what school you went to, how bad it was, what suburb you lived in, blah blah blah
buncha elitist wankers
buncha elitist wankers
Sunday, August 17
DoGS
I met up with a friend and her dog today, the dogs a deaf blue healer.
It was the most relaxing, fun exercise ive had in ages. We hung out for an hour and a half and threw the ball around for the dog.
When i was a kid i was shit scared of dogs, even now i freak out around them. But when im with her and her dog i am so relaxed, other dogs can run up to me and i dont freak out in any way. its so cool.
thanks Ms. L
It was the most relaxing, fun exercise ive had in ages. We hung out for an hour and a half and threw the ball around for the dog.
When i was a kid i was shit scared of dogs, even now i freak out around them. But when im with her and her dog i am so relaxed, other dogs can run up to me and i dont freak out in any way. its so cool.
thanks Ms. L
aRouSeD
tonight i went to a friends burpday at a bar, i hung out and chatted, drank and the usual stuff you do. i met a few cool people, there was one woman there i had a 5 minute reproductive rights conversation with, instead of the usual drunken small talk. it was great, i like having conversations like that after a few drinks, it forces my brain to think. ive forgotten her name already (as usual) but i wont forget her in a hurry.
to the woman who aroused my mind, if you ever read this, thanks, you rock!
to the woman who aroused my mind, if you ever read this, thanks, you rock!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
