ANoTHeR BuNCH of BLooDY PRoVeRBS:
“a bald doctor cannot cure baldness”
congolese

“even monkeys fall from trees”
japanese

“the hare that escaped had 8 legs”
sinhalese

“a bull does not enjoy fame in 2 herds”
rhodesian

“the mills of the gods grind slow, but they grind small”
greek

“who makes you pay in tears, you make him pay in blood”
ugandan
…and people wonder why there are so many people killed in wars in africa

“no one goes to bed without learning something new”
spanish
what about learning something new in bed, nudge, nudge, wink, wink

“you can endure a few kicks, if the cow gives you milk”
hindi
something to remember when having problems with a partner

MY BiRTHDaY
On the weekend before my birthday I had a double party with a friend (miss A) at her place. It was a Pimps, Prostitutes, Pornstars, Pirates & Priests Party. It was fun, we wnet halves in a good bottle of tequila with 3 worms in it. I drank lots but slowly and only tequila, so no spewing that night and no mega-headache the next day. Partied at the house first, alternating between frozen margaritas and shots of tequila. Just before we left me and Miss A had a worm each, we chewed it, showed it was chewed, then swallowed it. It’s the tougher way to do it cos it nasty to chew, but it’s a good delayed effect later on when you have the worm.
Then we went to a club, boogied there until it closed, then went to another club and partied there til it closed and got home around 7-8am. Drifted in and out of sleep until about 11.30am. I got drunk enough to have a fuzzy memory about where those who werent going to the 2nd club went to. I sort of remember saying goodbye but the cold night air probably gave the alcohol a boost to my brain.
I got a lift home from the very cute Miss L who looked very hot the previous night, thanks Miss L. Then another friend (mr S) visited and we went to Nandos, I ate half a chicken and chips, extra hot sauce of course. I felt so full as a bull afterwards because they took ages to get us our chips so we got extra. After a big walk home we watched a the infamous Retardotron Video Mixtape DVD. Fucking hilarious stuff. Later that night I ate a sandwich and felt full as a bull again. I didn’t actually go to bed til 1am cos I was watching the final LordOftheRings on tv. Wish we had a bigger tv, ours is tiny, but I suppose that helps us concentrate more on the storyline than the effects.
I feel unusually okay after a weekend of tequila, a worm, boogying, not much sleep and lots of hot post booze fast food.
On my actual birthday I met up with my best friend, we had a chilled day, chatting and shopping, she got some new pants and I got a book of how to talk dirty in different languages. She brings me down to earth and chills me out after a big weekend, she keeps me sane and I don’t know what id do without her, thanks MissJ.

MaRVeL 1602
(by Neil Gaiman, Andy Kubert & Richard Isanove)
I just finished it. Bloody good story set in 1602 (obviously) with alot of marvel heros born or made back then. The are called witchbreed not mutants and their names are similar but old style. Try and guess who these two are, Peter Parquagh & Carlos Javier.
Its back cover blurb says “classic marvel icons such as x-men, spiderman, the fantasic 4 and daredevil appear in this intriguing world of 17th century sceince and sorcery, instantly familiat to readers, yet subtly different in this new time.”
Its very well written and has a lot of dialogue, which add to the storys charm. I can finish a all action comic tradepaperback in a day or 2 but this took over a week, which makes it more enjoyable to read, cos it actually makes you think about it more rather than just looking at pictures. Props to neil gaiman for his writing.
I highly recommend it to anyone into comics.

IF You CloSe YouR eYeS….
I picked up a great r&b track on a compilation cd, its called “Just Like” by Aaron Carl. It’s an ok track but the lyrics are hilarious. In the chorus he sings “if you close your eyes, it feels just like pussy”. Then he proceeds to say hell do all that stuff your girlfriend wont and other pervy stuff. It’s a dirty, dirty song by a dirty man and I love it. I would so love to have someone play this at a straight club just to see how long it takes for people to realise what he’s singing and see their reaction.